Watching I Dream of Jeannie reruns is the closest I will ever get to being an astronaut. Not a single molecule in my entire body is able to fit into the smarty pants the guys and gals at NASA wear. After sitting outside on a glorious early spring afternoon that is fine by me because I’m convinced we’ll never be able to find anywhere in the entire galaxy more perfect than a sunny deck with a beautiful view on an April day with the birds chirping and the blooms sprouting.
The thing about my deck as I’m writing this is that it is not really mine anymore anyway. I’m not trespassing. My real estate agent calls it possession. I call it living out of boxes until the moving company gets here in a few days.
Selling a house is nerve wracking and as I look around at the walls I painted and the floors I scrubbed for ten years I realize I am not going to miss the place I tried to make perfect for me and my son. The fireplace has kept us warm, and the grass is trampled from playing catch. I’ve gnashed teeth over a leaky roof and nearly fainted when the toilet overflowed. There were multiple close calls with the lawnmower, and my legs have faint scars from the time I got in the way of the weed eater. My son and I got through it all together. He was always my support telling me everything would be okay when I cried from frustration. I never would have made it through the week we had squirrels in the attic without him. The kitchen still needs a facelift and the bathrooms are showing their age. There is not enough time or money in a day to do everything. The most important home improvement was raising my son to be a good kid.
I am not going to miss this place. I know that now. I’m taking with me everything I was meant to keep. Maturity. How to install a ceiling fan. Patience. The last one came in handy when I had to sit through the closing with a smile on my face. The buyer seemed like a nice lady and of course I’m grateful she wanted the house. The negotiation process to get us here was not friendly. After years in the corporate world I should not have expected anything else. Business is business. Sitting across from her I kept wondering how long it would be before the septic tank needed to be pumped again.
The view from the deck is beautiful today. A forest of trees. A winding creek. Grazing deer. The breeze is warm. I want to soak it up before I have to leave. There are no regrets about my choice. I have to leave. My life is changing every day in every possible way. Night classes are training me for the job I always wanted even if it means starting over and rebuilding.
When one door closes another one opens. On the other side of this sale will be a life for me and my son better than any house. I’m not scared of change. I’m scared of being unhappy. The papers are signed. There is no going back, and the view from this deck never looked better.